And I thought "The Man Mess" was Bad...

I feel that I need to make a "public statement" regarding the status drama that has exploded in the last 24 hours. I take responsibility that my status was unclear. What I meant to ask was, "As a past bride, or a currently married couple, what Jewish wedding advice would you give to current brides and engaged couples? What do you wish someone had told you?" I cannot say yet publicly what this is for but it is work related and I am excited to share it with all of you next month, God willing. If you do have any tips or advice on this subject please feel free to privately message me (because apparently doing so publicly will require security.)

What I think is so sad is that while Facebook allows us to be able to meet and have debates with people we don't even know, being online people read things differently then we intend. Some were making light hearted, or well intended remarks, and were taken harshly, or in the wrong way, and what came from this was rude, mean, cyber bullying. I believe in the freedom of speech (clearly) so while some of the words of wisdom shared were not what I was looking for, I still think it is perfectly acceptable to share. I think that some young women in the world (particularly the Orthodox Jewish world I live in) can often feel pressured to get married before they are ready and the women around them are not honest about what marriage is all about. So an open and frank discussion about not just the wonderful things about marriage, but also some of its challenges is an important one. It is just not what my status was intended for. And there is a way to have that discussion. With respect. Everyone is entitled to their opinions, feelings and experiences. I truly believe that no one can judge another person for how they feel and deal with things and someone else can tell them they are wrong.

I cannot image being a young pre-teen or teenage girl in this modern technology world, and I thank God that I am not. I thought that being an adult I would never have to experience, let alone witness, such blatant anger, bordering on hatred, between people, two women, that do not even know each other. I am ashamed that my well intended status caused such friction and made anyone feel badly or bullied. There were some glimmers of support and others, while entertained, chose to comment to my actual question posed, but for the most part everyone is now looking to that status and while many are entertained, many also feel the unease and bullying that I feel when I read it. I will be taking down the status and I apologize for any feelings hurt that have come from it. I will not support anyone speaking like that to anyone. I hope that everyone involved (you know who you are) will apologize to one another privately, regardless of how they now feel about each other. You don't need Yom Kippur (the day of atonement) to say "I'm sorry." So today I say to everyone who commented, was tagged, and is reading this: I am so sorry and I hope you forgive me.